Suicide Hotline Manager
CantSay, US
Female, 0
I supervise and train telephone operators for a suicide hotline. In addition to answering phones myself, I am also available when questions about protocol come up or if a phone operator is having trouble dealing with the emotions being expressed by a caller. Like many non-profits, we are now in danger of being shut down because of budget cuts.
My take on suicide in general is that there is almost always a strong chance that life will improve. I've spoken to a number of people at the hotline who called to thank us because having a lifeline stopped them from committing suicide, which they now realize would have been the wrong choice for them. I've also spoken to those left behind by suicide and heard them describe the pain their loved one's actions have caused them. Suicide obliterates any chance to experience a better future and leaves a trail of damage in its wake. Ultimately, however, suicide is an individual right and along with that right should come the option of ending one's life in a painless manner. With something like an chronically painful, untreatable disease I particularly understand the decision to end that suffering and I see why a doctor should be allowed to assist the individual. I do wonder, though, if we openly acknowledge suicide as a culturally acceptable option whether it will potentially encourage those who might have held on longer to end their lives instead. It's a complex issue obviously and one that I have great ambivalence about despite my "insider's position".
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We try to foster open communication on the lines and behind the scenes. There is lot of chatting with operators when they come on shift and serious discussion if something distracting is going on in their lives. We respect our operators and would not tell someone they had to go home early if they felt capable of handling their emotions, but we are vigilant in ensuring our callers receive the best service and will check in regularly throughout the shift to make sure they are not taking on more than they can handle.
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We do get calls like that and they brighten up everyone's day. We really care about our callers and, aside from feeling good because of positive feedback, we are genuinely happy for them when life begins to improve.
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It’s impossible not to become emotionally invested in some callers, but it only makes you want to stay longer. When you hear the sadness in someone’s voice, it makes it hard not to give more and more. You start to see how it affects your outside life, the patience you find for people you would normally ignore, the sympathy you feel for the tragedies you would have previously done your best to overlook. Over time you learn to deal with the emotions that come from listening to sadness all day long. You compartmentalize it so that you can go home and still have a good night and so that you don’t bring your emotions onto a call. The call should always be about what the caller is going through, not what you’re dealing with.
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There are a fair number of people who realize early on that this isn't the right sort of work for them. On the other hand, there are people who stay with it for decades. Like many jobs it's about the right fit, but because of the seriousness of the work you quickly realize that you're not the only one who will be affected if you are not performing at your best.
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There are a ton of crucial non-for-profits that are in danger or have been closed since the recession started. The mentally ill generally don't vote, don't earn enough to pay high taxes, require a number of costly social services, and are typically unable to advocate for themselves. As a result they are easy targets when it comes time to reduce budgets.
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I think a number of factors go into play. For one thing, suicide rates are higher in areas of economic and political crisis. For example, Greece used to have the lowest suicide rate in Europe, but since the financial collapse, it has had one of the highest. Probably another consideration is the availability of mental health care and crisis intervention, which is pretty weak in most countries. Additionally, in more interdependent cultures, it is hard to acknowledge personal needs when the normative value is on preserving balance within the social circle.
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