Xander
Hollywood, CA
Male, 32
I was a practitioner of Pick-Up Arts, as taught through numerous books, classes, and online forums. Now I help legions of average, frustrated chumps learn how to interact with women and land the dates and relationships they've always wanted.
I was fortunate in that I was never really terrible with women so pretty quickly after I starting going out regularly I was seeing that girls responded to me. But a little like a game of wack-a-mole when you learn one thing you find others popping up. For example I'm still trying to get comfortable with a girl telling me she likes me without freaking out.
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I've never had anyone I thought was hopeless but I know coaches who have. There is definitely a point where I can go no further as coach and a therapist has to pick up the baton. Like the proverbial onion, peoples' layers often take time to peel away and often reveal things that they didn't know were there. And like most things, you can lead a horse to water......
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I'm of an ethnicity known for wearing too much so I abstain completely but I think most guys can get away with a dash. It's hard not to envison cheesy meatheads putting on Acqua Di Gio before grinding at Pure in Vegas but some women have told me they like it so feel free to knock yourself out.
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There are a small minority of chronic womanizers who are just trying to run up their numbers, but I'd say 95% of the guys that I coach want to have a little fun for a few years and settle down with a cool girlfriend. They just want to feel like they have some say in the matter.
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Toll Collector
Do you think there will be a time where all tolls are automated?
Pharmacist
Have you ever given someone the wrong prescription?
Pharmaceutical Researcher
Is there or isn't there a cure for AIDS?
Ha... this kind of makes me chuckle because it highlights a little bit of gender projection. When we guys talk to a girl (especially in a bar) it's because we want to hook up with her. Black and white; plain and simple. Doesn't work that way for girls. She gets most of what she wants (ego boost, feeling desired) from the flirtation itself. In psychology this is the concept of narcisstic supply. Or put another way as a study on female sexuality concluded, "For women, feeling desired is the orgasm." So while yes it is possbile you can still hook up and that she's just mentioning it so she feels like it's your fault when it happens ("I told him I have a boyfriend!"), it's much more likely that she's enjoying the flirtation and attention with no intention of actually acting on it. You're much better off moving on. This all assumes of course that she's telling the truth about having a boyfriend and not just blowing you off.... I hear that happens sometimes. :)
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There are always attractive women there and perhaps there's something to the "nesting" aspect of the place. Lines are overrated. There's nothing wrong with "Hey I know this is a pretty random place to do this but I want to meet you. I'm Xander." If you want to get cute you could also ask "Hey do you know where they sell blankets in here?"
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I know Neil and have met and been out with Mystery on many occasions. I've met virtually all of the characters in The Game. Haven't worked with any of them although I did work for the biggest PUA company on an independent project for a time in exchange for some coaching.
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