Miss DayCare
Charlotte, NC
Female, 30
I work in a highly respected, franchised Day Care Provider. I have taught in Toddler classrooms as well as Pre-Kindegarten classrooms. It's a wonderful and rewarding profession and I love every minute of it. I have become friends with many of my parents and they all ask questions which is why I want to open a dialogue here so I can be as honest and open as possible about your most prized posession's early childhood education and what really goes on in the classrooms and hallways!
If there is any suspicion regarding a child's home life, we let the director know about our findings and they handle it. I have had this happen only one time in my years of working in this industry and my suspicions were true. It's an awful situation for everyone involved but after all was said and done the mother thanked me (she was a victim of the abuse as well), and she said we helped her find the strength to leave her husband and get her family the help it needed.
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I've dealt with pretty much everything to a mom coming in every hour on the hour to make sure her child who was potty training got her chance to sit on the toilet (and she did with or without her mother being there). Parents would come in at lunch time to sit with their kids while they ate. I've even had a mom (it's usually the mothers) accost me at a restaurant on a weekend day because she didn't feel her son was getting enough attention at school...mind you this mother was a stay at home mom with only one child and he was in our school mon through fri 7 AM to 6 PM....I'm thinking he wasn't getting enough attention at home but i'm not a licensed psychologist....When I was in an infant classroom I had a mother come in and stay with her baby almost all day and not allow us to build a relationship with her daughter so when we went to go near her the baby would scream and the mom would blame us because we weren't acceptable caregivers and didn't know how to act around her daughter. I do welcome over protective parents and accept their neurosis to an extent, but when it interferes with my job and my classroom, I need to have an open and honest conversation with them usually with a director present so it's documented. I've found that an open dialogue is key with these types of parents and they tend to back off and trust you a bit more once everything is out in the open....this is only the tip of the iceberg....I could write a book with this question alone!
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Yea there have been many. Mostly with the kids that physically harm other kids. Behavioral problems are not easy to take care of, but a bit more manageable than that of the kids that bite or hit. Biters are the absolute worst because they break skin sometimes and that can get the kids sent home that got bit and the child that bit them (due to health concerns). I have had many meetings with parents regarding biting and hitting, some parents are responsive and want to "fix" the behavior and be very hands on, and some just think that kids are kids and they will grow out of their negative behaviors. Again this is where communication is key. Sometime parents think daycare teachers are glorified babysitters and do not take us seriously. What they fail to see is that being in this industry is a career choice for many of us much like choosing to be a doctor or lawyer is to a parent. We are passionate, and want to make a difference in these childrens' lives!
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Placing a 2 year old in a time out his first week? That seems kind of crazy to me too and as a mother myself I wouldn't be happy either! As much as I want to answer a stern NO to your question, I cannot. The reason why I say that is because timeouts are a simple and effective way to dealing with a problem (especially at 2 years old). I personally do not use a timeout method for disciplining my own child or the kids in my classes, so I have had no complaints in this department. I only answer this way because I have seen this in every facility I have worked in when parents are unhappy with a disciplinary measure taken in the classroom. The director is always going to side with the parent (after all they are paying for the service), notify the teacher, and it's up to the teacher to uphold the agreement of not using the time out method (in your case it seems a bit extreme, I cannot believe they did that to a two year old!). Until your child can communicate with you and tell you every aspect of his/her day in the classroom, you must trust your teacher (and that builds over time) that they aren't going against your wishes and if they are find somewhere else to go because there are plenty of places that are fantastic and wouldn't do that to you or your child. I can understand making a mistake once but if it happens again and you've already had an agreement in place, that's unacceptable. I hate to sound negative or put you on edge, and I wish I could have a more definite answer for you. My gut is telling me that they are continuing with the timeouts because I have seen it over and over again even after a parents asks them not to.
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I have only worked at one that had video surveillance, and quite frankly it doesn't put the teachers at ease that they are there. It was a very "big brother" feeling. That was about 8 years ago and the three places I have worked since then have not had cameras.
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I'm not a fan of that kind of education because I believe that kids need structure and the earlier they learn it the better. Built into the cirriculum I use is free time where the class can go to various stations and do what they want with their friends, but when time is up, they clean everything up, and return as a group for our next scheduled activity. There are pros and cons to montessori schools, but it's just a preference to the parent. I've worked in that environment as well and some kids do very well independently and can work like that, but most of them needed a schedule to follow.
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That's something that I am so interested in and look for in every class I teach. You most definitely see which ones are more introverted and which are more social. Sometime they surprise you though, the most attached toddler can blossom at three or four and become a totally different person so it's really fascinating to see them go on that journey of self discovery and finding who they are.
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